So I'm a big believer in the fact that everything happens for a reason. I just don't know why sometimes. I believe that everyone who touches your life in some way, shape or form was meant to cross paths with for some reason or another, even if you don't know what that reasoning may be. Life is about sifting through those weeds until you come across that beautiful flower that makes it all worth while. When life isn't going your way, suck it up and get through it. Nobody is perfect, we all encounter hardships, and being proactive is about the best thing you can do when life puts you in a situation where your abilities and strength, whether mental or physical, are tested.
This last year or so has been one of the best and one of the worst years of my life. I was tested in so many ways, but I welcome the challenge, because someday I will look at these times and see that they shaped me.
It was about this time last year that I went from being in la la land with somebody to being thrown into the harsh reality of what dealing with guys is really like. Not all guys are terrible, but there are a select few out there who really make a girl wonder.They say that when you really feel for somebody you are blind. I believe that every word of that last sentence is the absolute truth. I also believe that I got dealt a bit of a bad apple with that one. Its funny how you can see all that's Golden in someone, while all along the way people are throwing out warnings left and right, that you don't acknowledge until after your heart has been thrown into a blender. The reason I bring this up is that there are still disputes happening a year later. By no fault of my own, but that's what happens when you have to cross each others paths every once in a while. I'm hoping that with some minor changes, that road has now been blocked. I guess we will see what the future holds. I'm not really sure what I can take out of this other than to be more cautious. I'm slowly starting to let that wall get broken down that I've had up for so long.
New people have come along. New friends, new faces, more excitement. Its crazy the way people come into your life, but they can also leave just as fast. I've had my head wrapped around someone for the longest time. Its like they come and go, come and go. One day, I'm really excited, the next I'm sitting here questioning myself. "I hear the funny hesitation of a heart that's never really sure". Thank you Mark Wills for taking the words out of my mouth. I don't want to say too too much here, just in case that person is reading, but I cant help but wonder if theres a reason why everything I do reminds me of this person. Ive really been pondering for a bit.
I also want to give a shout out to Cheyenne here. I met her a bit back and shes quickly become one of the very best friends I have. This poor girl has to go through so much ranting sometimes its not even funny. Its nice to have someone to relate to my experiences lately too.
I've also moved quite a bit in the last year. I think this latest one makes....4 times? yikes! I've seen both the ups and downs of living at home and on your own. I've also learned that roommates are not always a bright idea. It's all gravy until you realize that you really dont have a say in who comes over or what goes on sometimes. I pretty much set myself up for what happened with that last one, but you live and learn, and now I have some great stories to tell :) I can definitely say that after being out, home isn't always where you want to go back to, but there are some definite benefits to go along with the downfalls.Again, a reason behind everything. Living and learning as I go!
Best part of this last year or so? I've been allowed to do some growing up! I'm the oldest daughter, and even at nearly 20 years of age, I'm treated like a child a lot of the time. Not so much right now! Its a funny thing when parents come to the sudden realization that they have to let you make your own mistakes, and they've just gotta let you go sometimes. Never would I have guessed my mom would let me do half the stuff Ive gotten away with lately. Especially staying the night, in a different state, on a random last minute trip with a friend that happened to be male. Its nice to spread my wings a little. But with this comes more responsibility. I really like it to tell you the truth. I feel like an adult, not a 12 year old.
But anyhow, I'm almost out of time for this post, but every time you come across a hardship, whether is be a person or a situation...just remember the Golden Rule...Theres a reason behind everyone and everything. I promise you that. Until next time bloggers! hopefully I will be able to get more posts in. This blog is looking sad after deleting some of the old stuff.
